This is a song I recently listened to the radio, I was coming back home and the speakers of my car pumped it out. And I started listening to every single word of this song. I do love its rhythm and Christina Aguilera’s voice in the background makes this song a kind of whisper, that voice within our minds that rarely enjoys the voice of our mouths.
Sometime is hard to say something. It’s hard because there are many feelings in the surrounding and we have no idea of how to manage them. We are unable to give a name to those feelings and we only keep silent. More than a poet said that silence holds back lots of words. The problem is understanding the meaning of these words.
Sometimes keeping silent means ignoring someone, who is the addressee of that voice within, so noisy in our hearts. We keep silent, we let that person go and we bow out. Nothing more. That person is going away and we only keep silent.
“Say something” is the sentence we would like to say to many people, maybe. Say something, tell me what is wrong with me, enlighten me, share your feelings with me and so on.
It is hard to say goodbye to someone you love and you are fond of. It is hard because you don’t want to say goodbye to him or her. But you have to. Life is a blending of positive and negative emotions. Emotions that drive our days, our thoughts, our silences and we barely realize it.
Is silence only a short way to give up on someone? Maybe. It is as short as difficult. It triggers so many suppositions, regrets, unhappiness. This is because when you share nice moments with someone, when you realize that person is something more than many other people you met in a specific period of your life, you want to promise to that person that it will never be a goodbye and that you’ll do your best to meet him or her again, soon.
A silent goodbye it’s a noisy “I don’t want you to go away”. A silent goodbye it’s a stab in the heart, a missing promise, it’s like shutting a door and running away. And when you receive it, when a silent goodbye separates you from that person, you can only stand in front of that door, waiting. You start thinking lots of things, you start shifting the blame on you. And then, inevitably, a tear drops off your eyes, washing up all those feelings on your body. In that moment you realize that you should move on, even though that feeling will never disappear completely. But this is the life, or as french people would say, “c’est la vie”.
A silent goodbye it’s a silent “see you soon”. As silent as pat.
My biggest regret was going away without telling you how hard was accepting that silent goodbye to me. I am not expecting any “something”, but my naive heart does.